Emma is the mother of Beth, a bright, sociable fourteen-year-old who has a condition known as- Pathological Demand Avoidance Syndrome or PDA - which is recognised as being on the high functioning Autistic Spectrum.
Until last year, Beth had been attending a mainstream Secondary school in Warwickshire local to the family but when she began experiencing extremely high levels of anxiety, the school broke the news to Beth's parents that they weren't able to provide for her needs any longer. Mum Emma, picks up the story…
Coping with High School
"Although moving to High School in Year 7 was an anxious time for Beth, we felt that she did settle in, but as time progressed her condition meant that she found it increasingly difficult to cope with the changes. Any child with Autism needs routine but it became too difficult for Beth to deal with even relatively 'small' changes such as switching classroom or teacher for a lesson and in the end she was spending more time out of the class than in it.Increase in Anxiety
When a trusted self-employed support worker left and the school weren't immediately able to provide any one-to-one assistance for Beth, things took a turn for the worse. This, exacerbated by complications in procuring a full Statement for Beth in order to fund extra help,contributed to Beth's already volatile state. Beth's levels of anxiety were so great that any time she spent in school was taken up with trying to manage her reactions rather than her education - to the detriment of both the school and Beth. Eventually, an emergency review meeting was called with Warwickshire County Council and in January 2014 we were told that a decision had been reachedthat the school couldn't meet Beth's needs and she wouldn't be able to take her GCSE's with them. We would have to look for an alternative provider.
Tell us your circumstances and we will map out a realistic school application strategy that maximises your chance of getting your preferred school.
Try our School Application Strategist free, here on this site →A New School for Beth
The onus was then on Warwickshire to come up with options where Beth could attend school and in the meantime she was to remain at home. After looking at most of the schools in the area, only two were seriously considered - one for bullied children which all parties agreed was not at all appropriate for Beth - and the other for mentally and physically disabled children, who also returned the opinion that they were not the right place either. In the end in the absence of any other suggestions, we, as parents, searched the length and breadth of the country to find any school which had experience in teenage girls with PDA and which could provide Beth with the right kind of care, educational provisionand social peer group. We eventually found a good option; Limpsfield Grange.
Specialist Provision
This school specialises in offering places to young people fitting Beth's social and emotional profile. The problem, however was that it was in Surrey at the other end of the country! This started a whole new roller-coaster in trying to work out how a child living in Warwickshire was able to attend a school in Surrey. Having an established home and four other children to consider, moving is currently not an option and so we started the process of inter-county talks to find out the viability of Warwickshire funding a place for Beth in Surrey as a boarder.
Your situation may be slightly different. ask a question below ↓ and our editorial team will reply with our advice.
Trial Period
For this to happen Surrey County Council had to agree to provide a place for Beth, which they will do as long as the school are happy she will settle after a formal assessment and then a three month trial dependent on a positive trend in Beth's progress. The situation at the moment is that Warwickshire and Surrey are working together and there is finally an agreement in place to try some 'taster' sessions with Beth. Easy as this sounds, we now start the enormous uphill struggle for our family to help Beth understand that attending Limpsfield Grange will be the best educational option for her future whilst at the same time we are all reeling from the shock of potentially having our 14-year-old daughter leave the family home to attend school hundreds of miles away. Beth has already had to cope with so much and to manage this move will be no mean feat.
Mixed Feelings
At the moment we have mixed feelings. Whilst we are relieved to have found a positive school option for Beth, we are frustrated and angry at the sheer amount of time and energy it has taken to find any school near to where we live which has the skills to deal with Beth's type of autism - as well as the practical issues associated with Beth not having received regular education for the past few months and no formal schooling at all since December 2013. I feel that if we hadn't chased for answers at every stage and done the research on finding an appropriate school ourselves, I don't know what would have happened. We're all just trying to keep positive and look forward to Limpsfield Grange accepting Beth long term and to Warwickshire organising her relocation. It's so important to get the right school for your child, whoever they are and I'm hoping and praying that this will be the right move for us all and that Beth will be happy".
I am much worried about my son who is autistic is presently in Primary 1 MAINSTREAM school, Barnet couldn't get him to get a place in any of the specialised provisions schools 3 years in a roll and I feel it is time to find a private school for him. Even in the mainstream school he couldn't get a place in the autistic (project) class, he has been hanging in a corner of a mainstream class for 3 years, he isn't part of the class as he isn't participating in any of the class activities neither mix, he definitely not getting the required support. Despite all complaints to the school and even to the Council Educational board nothing has changed, it is getting near another end/start of academic year, they still keep promising just as done in the last consecutive years, I need to make a move to help my son and us as it is becoming more difficult as he is growing older. We live in Colindale/Hendon area. Does anyone knows and can help with private independent Special Needs school? We need to send him next year to an appropriate school that can help.I need your help, please. Kind regards Francis.
I am too much worried about my son he has autism and I try to find a private school for him I am living in Ilford If in my area or in London any private independent Special Needs school plz tell me the name I want to send him next year I need your help, please.
Kind regards
Fareha
I want to thank you for sharing your story. My Daughter is 12 as High functioning autism, currently in a state school, we live in London. Can you tell me how your Daughter is getting on at Limpsfield Grange school please. Im considering moving there if I can get a place for my Daughter. Please tell me how your Daughter is doing. I hope your Daughter is blossoming and happy.
Many many thanks and kind regards
Xena
Daughter is at her wits end as the SEN team, the SENDIAAS team, autism outreach and the school cannot find a place for him. They say they have done all they can for him. Ridiculous, he is entitled to an education. She is trying to educate him at home with work from school. He has not been in school since Easter.
She doesn't know where to turn. Can anyone advise where she is to go now?
Ask Get the Right School a question
Ask our editorial team a question and we will reply with our advice. Tell us as much about your situation as you can: the more detail you give, the more useful our answer can be.
You do not need to use your real name. Please do not include your full address, phone number, email address, or the names of other people. We may edit or remove identifying details for privacy and legal reasons.
Comments are moderated before publication.